Amazing Grace - the conversion of slave trader John Newton

John Newton

Let us never forget the amazing wonders of God’s grace, for the Lord may even bring the most hardened sinner into a life of faith and grace; the chief example of this being the apostle Paul. John Newton is another wonderful example. This should encourage sinners to turn to the Lord for mercy and grace, no matter how far outside his forgiveness we may have thought we were.

John Newton, a former slave-trader, was converted at the age of twenty three, and became a well-loved Minister, and an abolitionist, who preached against the evils of the slave-trade and encouraged those who worked towards abolition in the political sphere.

Newton was the author of the words of Amazing Grace, one of the most well-known and well-loved hymns in the past 250 years. Amazing Grace has become the national hymn of Scotland, but it’s popularity continues even into the latter part of the 21st century in all English-speaking parts of the world, despite the great decline in Christian practice and belief in the West since the late ‘60s.

John Newton on political action in the cause of righteousness

Many who are working to expose the crimes of big Pharma and the reality of the massive experiment into which the great majority of humanity have been coerced to participate may find that John Newton’s words about the slave trade and the political fight for righteousness apply equally well to our present predicament, in which such great unrighteousness is being perpetrated on an international level, and the Nuremberg code itself, the ethical rules drawn up in response to the crimes of the Nazi era, has been spurned and ignored by the health authorities, governments, and a large proportion of the medical professionals in many countries.

Here is what Newton said about the political fight for abolition:

I am not qualified, and if I were, I would think it rather unsuitable to my present character, as a Minister of the Gospel, to consider the African Slave Trade, merely, in a political light. This disquisition more properly belongs to persons in civil life. Only thus far my character as a Minister will allow, and perhaps require me, to observe, that the best Human Policy, is that which is connected with a reverential regard to Almighty God, the Supreme Governor of the Earth. Every plan, which aims at the welfare of a nation, in defiance of his authority and laws, however apparently wise, will prove to be essentially defective, and, if persisted in, ruinous. The Righteous Lord loveth Righteousness, and He has engaged to plead the cause, and vindicate the wrongs of the oppressed. It is Righteousness that exalteth a nation ; and Wickedness is the present reproach, and will, sooner or later, unless repentance intervene, prove the ruin of any people.

John Newton’s early life.

John Newton was born in London on July 24, 1725. His father was the captain of a merchant ship, and loved John, but was distant and aloof. John’s mother loved him tenderly. Being a devout non-conformist, she taught him whole chapters of Scripture at a time, together with hymns and poems. Unfortunately, John’s mother died just before his seventh birthday, and his father remarried, and when they had a child, Newton became second-best. Being somewhat neglected at home, John Newton’s father took him on sea voyages from the time he was 11 years old.

By the time he was 12, Newton had learned all the bad habits of a sailor, to swear and blaspheme, and despite some attempts at living a Christian life soon returned to his old habits. The sections in non-italic text are Newton’s own words; note that I have not edited out the things he says that may seem less than politically correct today, as the tenor of Newton’s whole life belies the sorts of linguistic peccadilloes for which people are condemned these days.

I began to pray, to read the Scripture, and keep a sort of diary. I was presently religious, in my own eyes ; but, alas ! this seeming goodness had no solid foundation, but passed away like a morning-cloud, or the early dew. I was soon weary, gradually gave it up, and became worse than before. Instead of prayer, I learned to curse and blaspheme, and was exceedingly wicked when not under my parent's view.

Indeed in later life, Newton’s swearing and blaspheming was too much even for the old salt sea-captain of the trading ship he was on, a man ‘not at all circumspect in his expressions’.

…my life, when awake, was a course of most horrid impiety and profaneness. I know not that I have ever since met so daring a blasphemer : not content with common oaths and imprecations, I daily invented new ones; so that I was often seriously reproved by the captain, who was himself a very passionate man, and not at all circumspect in his expressions. From the relation I at times made him of my past adventures, and what he saw of my conduct, and especially toward the close of the voyage, when he met with many disasters, he would often tell me that, to his grief, he had a Jonah on board ; that a curse attended me wherever I went ; and that all the troubles he met with in the voyage were owing to his having taken me into the vessel.

John Newton’s love for his wife.

In 1742, at the age of sixteen or seventeen, John Newton met his wife (Mary Catlett, c.1729-1790) and fell in love with her. Later on, when he returned from sea voyages he would go to see her, but until his conversion was tongue-tied and could not work up the courage express his love for her or his desire to marry her.

A FEW DAYS BEFORE my intended journey, I received an invitation to visit very intimate friends of my mother in Kent. Because of a coolness after my father's second marriage, I had heard nothing of them for many years.

I obtained my father's permission to call on them, but I was very indifferent about it and sometimes thought of passing on. However, I went. I was known at first sight, and met with the kindest reception, as the child of a dear, deceased friend.

My friends had two daughters. The eldest, as I learned some years after, had been considered by her mother and mine as a future wife for me, from the time of her birth. I do not say that my mother predicted what was to happen, yet there was something remarkable in the manner of its taking place.

All intercourse between the families had been long broken off; I was going into a foreign country and only called to pay a hasty visit. This I should not have thought of, but for a message received just at that crisis, for I had not been invited before. The circumstances were precarious in the highest degree, and the event extraordinary.

Almost at the first sight of this girl (for she was then under fourteen) I felt an affection for her, which never abated or lost its influence a single moment in my heart. In degree, it equalled all that the writers of romance have imagined; in duration it was unalterable. I soon lost all sense of religion, and became deaf to the remonstrances of conscience. But none of the misery I experienced ever banished her a single hour from my waking thoughts for seven years following.

Hardly anything less than this violent and commanding passion would have been sufficient to awaken me from the dull melancholy habit I had contracted. I was almost a misanthrope, notwithstanding I so much admired the pictures of virtue and benevolence as drawn by Lord Shaftesbury. Now my reluctance to active life was overcome, and I was willing to be or to do anything which might accomplish my wishes at some future time.…When I later made shipwreck of faith, hope and conscience, my love to this person was the only remaining principle which in any degree took their place. The bare possibility of seeing her again was the only means of restraining me from the most horrid designs against myself and others.

John Newton’s situation worsens.

Newton eventually ended up working on the Harwich, a slave trading ship, and he hardened his heart even further.

Newton writing about the slave trade.

Newton describes the dreadful effects of the slave trade upon those who are engaged in it, and the dreadful conditions the slaves had to endure.

…the dreadful effects of this trade, upon the minds of those who are engaged in it. There are, doubtless, exceptions, and I would, willingly, except myself. But, in general, I know of no method of getting money, not even that of robbery, for it, upon the highway, which has a more direct tendency to efface the moral sense, to rob the heart of every gentle and humane disposition, and to harden it, like steel, against all impressions of sensibility.

Usually, about two-thirds of a cargo of Slaves are males. When a hundred and fifty or two hundred front men, torn from their native land, many of whom never saw the sea, much less a ship, till a short space before they are embarked, who have, probably, the same natural prejudice against a white man, as we have against a black ; and who often bring with them an apprehension that they are bought to be eaten : I say, when thus circumstanced, it is not to be expected that they will, tamely, resign themselves to their Situation. It is always taken for granted, that they will attempt to gain their liberty, if possible. Accordingly, as we dare not trust them, we receive them on board, from the first, as enemies: and before their number exceeds, perhaps, ten or fifteen, they are all put in irons; in most ships, two and two together. And frequently, they are not thus confined, as they might, most conveniently stand or move, the right hand and foot of one to the left of the other ; but across, that is, the hand and foot of each on the same side, whether right or left, are fettered together : so that they cannot move, either hand or foot, but with great caution, and with perfect, consent. Thus they must sit, walk and lie, for many months, (sometimes for nine or ten,) without any mitigation or relief, unless they are sick. In the night they are confined below, in the day-time (if the weather be fine) they are upon deck ; and as they are brought up, by pairs, a chain is put through a ring upon their irons, and this is likewise locked down to the ring-bolts, which are fastened at certain intervals upon the deck.

Newton ruins his relationship with a Captain who had treated him kindly.

Without seeking permission while on shore leave he went to see his future wife, and in so doing ruined his relationship with the Captain of that ship.

In December, 1744, the Harwich was in the Downs, bound to the East Indies. The Captain gave me liberty to go on shore for a day ; but without consulting prudence, or regarding consequences, I took horse, and following the dictates of my restless passion, I went to take a last leave of her I loved. I had little satisfaction in the interview, as I was sensible that I was taking pains to multiply my own troubles. The short time I could stay passed like a dream and on new-year's day, 1745, I took my leave to return to the ship. The captain was prevailed on to excuse my absence; but this rash step (especially as it was not the first liberty of the kind I had taken) highly displeased him, and lost me his favour, which I never recovered.

In his travels, Newton’s spiritual state worsened.

I now return to my voyage. During our passage to Madeira I was a prey to the most gloomy thoughts. Though I had well deserved all I met with, and the captain might have been justified if he had carried his resentment still farther- yet my pride at that time suggested that I had been grossly injured : and this so far wrought upon my wicked heart, that I actually formed designs against his life ; and this was one reason that made me willing to prolong my own. I was sometimes divided between the two, not thinking it practicable to effect both. The Lord had now, to appearance, given me up to judicial hardness; I was capable of any thing. I had not the least fear of God before my eyes, nor (so far as I remember) the least sensibility of conscience. I was possessed of so strong a spirit of delusion, that I believed my own lie, and was firmly persuaded that after death I should cease to be. Yet the Lord preserved me ! Some intervals of sober reflection would at times take place : when I have chosen death rather than life, a ray of hope would come in (though there was little probability for such a hope) that I should yet sec better days ; that I might again return to England, and have my wishes crowned, if I did not wilfully throw myself away. In a word, my love to Mrs. N was now the only restraint 1 had left. Though I neither feared God, nor regarded men, I could not bear that she should think meanly of me when I was dead. As, in the outward concerns of life, the weakest means are often employed by Divine Providence to produce great effects, beyond their common influence, (as when a disease, for instance, has been removed by a fright,) so I found it then, this single thought, which had not restrained me from a thousand smaller evils, proved my only and effectual barrier against the greatest and most fatal temptations. How long I could have supported this conflict, or what, humanly speaking, would have been the consequences of my continuing in that situation, I cannot say ; but the Lord, whom I little thought of, knew my danger, and was providing for my deliverance.

The Pegasus

He eventually ended up on another slave trader, the Pegasus.

On board the Harwich, though my principles were totally corrupted, yet, as upon my first going there I was in some degree staid and serious, the remembrance of this made me ashamed of breaking out in that notorious manner I could otherwise have indulged. But now, entering amongst strangers, I could appear without disguise ; and I well remember, that, while I was passing from the one ship to the other, this was one reason why I rejoiced in the exchange, and one reflection I made upon the occasion, namely, "that I now might be as abandoned as I pleased, without any control;" and from this time I was exceedingly vile indeed, little, if any thing, short of that animated description of an almost irrecoverable state, which we have in 2Pet.2:14. I not only sinned with a high hand myself, but made it my study to tempt and seduce others upon every occasion ; nay, I eagerly sought occasion, sometimes to my own hazard and hurt. One natural consequence of this carriage was, a loss of the favour of my new captain ; not that he was at all religious, or disliked my wickedness any further than it affected his interest, but I became careless and disobedient : I did not please him, becauseI did not intend it; and as he was a man of an odd temper likewise, we the more easily disagreed. Besides, I had a little of that unlucky wit, which can do little more than multiply troubles and enemies to its possessor and, upon some imagined affront, I made a song, in which I ridiculed his ship, his designs, and his person, and soon taught it to the whole ship's company. Such was the ungrateful return I made for his offers of friendship and protection. I had mentioned no names; but the allusion was plain; and he was no stranger either to the intention or the author. I shall say no more of this part of my story ; let it lib buried in eternal silence. But let me not be silent from the praise of that grace which could pardon, that blood which could expiate such sins as mine. Yea, “the Ethiopian may change his skin, and the leopard his spots," since I, who was the willing slave of every evil, possessed with a legion of unclean spirits, have been spared, and saved, and changed, to stand as a monument of his almighty power for ever.

John Newton was also a slave for a short time.

At the lowest time of his life, John Newton suffered a terrible reversal of fortune, having been a Captain of a slave ship, in one single he wound up as the employee of a slave trader who made a slave of Newton and gave him to his wife, an African woman, who treated him effectively as her slave, abusing him and maltreating him, even when he was very sick.

After this, Newton got into debt, and was actually sold as a slave.

I hope it will always be a subject of humiliating reflection to me, that I was, once, an active instrument, in a business at which my heart now shudders. My headstrong passions and follies plunged me, in early life, into a succession of difficulties and hardships, which, at length, reduced me to seek a refuge among the Natives of Africa There, for about the space of eighteen months, I was in effects though without the name, a Captive and a Slave myself - and was depressed to the lowest degree of human wretchedness.

…My new master had formerly resided near Cape Mount, but now he settled at the Plantanes, upon the largest of the three islands. It is a low sandy island, about two miles in circumference, and almost covered with palm-trees. We immediately began to build a house, and to enter upon trade. I had now some desire to retrieve my lost time, and to exert diligence in what was before me ; and he was a man with whom I might have lived tolerably well, if he had not been soon influenced against me : but he was much under the direction of a black woman, who lived with him as a wife.

She was a person of some consequence in her own country, and he owed his first rise to her interest. This woman (I know not for what reason) was strangely prejudiced against me from the first ; and what made it still worse for me, was a severe fit of illness, which attacked me very soon, before I had opportunity to show what I could or would do in his service. I was sick when he sailed in a shallop to Rio Nuna, and he left me in her hands. At first I was taken some care of; but as I did not recover very soon, she grew weary, and entirely neglected me. I had sometimes not a little difficulty to procure a draught of cold water when burning with a fever. My bed was a mat spread upon a board or chest, and a log of wood my pillow. When my fever left me, and my appetite returned, I would gladly have eaten, but there was none gave unto me. She lived in plenty herself, but hardly allowed me sufficient to sustain life, except now and then, when in the highest good humour, she would send me victuals in her own plate after she had dined ; and this (so greatly was my pride humbled) I received with thanks and eagerness, as the most needy beggar does an alms. Once, I well remember, I was called to receive this bounty from her own hand; but being exceeding weak and feeble, I dropped the plate. Those who live in plenty can hardly conceive how this loss touched me ; but she had the cruelty to laugh at my disappointment; and though the table was covered with dishes, (for she lived much in the European manner,) she refused to give me any more. My distress has been at times so great as to compel me to go by night and pull up roots in the plantation, (though at the risk of being punished as a thief,) which I have eaten raw upon the spot, for fear of discovery. The roots I speak of are very wholesome food when boiled or roasted ; but as unfit to be eaten raw, in any quantity, as a potatoe. The consequence of this diet, which, after the first experiment, I always expected, and seldom missed, was the same as if I had taken tartar emetic ; so that I have often returned as empty as I went yet necessity urged me to repeat the trial several times. I have sometimes been relieved by strangers; nay even by slaves in the chain, who have secretly brought me victuals (for they durst not be seen to do it) from their own slender pittance. Next to pressing want, nothing sits harder upon the mind than scorn and contempt; and of this, likewise, I had an abundant measure. When I was very slowly recovering, this woman would sometimes pay me a visit, not to pity or relieve, but to insult me. She would call me worthless and indolent, and compel me to walk which, when I could hardly do, she would set her attendants to mimic my motion, to clap their hands, laugh, and throw limes at me ; or, if they chose, to throw stones; (as I think was the case once or twice;) they were not rebuked but , in general , though all who depended on her favour must join in her treatment, yet, when she was out of sight I was rather pitied than scorned by the meanest of her slaves.

John Newton’s dream.

John Newton had a marvellous dream that foreshadowed his conversion, and the grace that God showed to him.

The consideration of whom I am writing to, renders it needless for me either to enter upon a discussion of the nature of dreams in general, or to make an apology for recording my own. Those who acknowledge Scripture will allow that there have been monitory and supernatural dreams, evident communications from heaven, either directing or foretelling future events : and those who are acquainted with the history and experience of the people of God, are well assured, that such intimations have not been totally withheld in any period down to the present times. Reason, far from contradicting this supposition, strongly pleads for it, where the process of reasoning is rightly understood and carefully pursued. So that a late eminent writer, who I presume is not generally charged with enthusiasm, undertakes to prove, that the phenomenon of dreaming is inexplicable at least, if not absolutely impossible, without taking in the agency and intervention of spiritual beings, to us invisible. For my own part, I can say, without scruple," The dream is certain, and the interpretation thereof sure." I am sure I dreamed to the following effect ; and I cannot doubt, from what I have seen since, that it had a direct and easy application to my own circumstances, to the dangers in which I was about to plunge myself, and to the unmerited deliverance and mercy which God would be pleased to afford me in the time of my distress.

Though I have written out a relation of this dream more than once for others, it has happened that I never reserved a copy; but the principal incidents are so deeply engraven on my memory, that I believe I am not liable to any considerable variation in repeating the account.

The scene presented to my imagination was the harbour of Venice, where we had lately been. I thought it was night, and my watch upon the deck ; and that, as I was walking to and fro by myself, a person came to me, (I do not remember from whence,) and brought me a ring, with an express charge to keep it carefully ; assuring me, that while I preserved that ring, I should be happy and successful; but if I lost or parted with it, I must expect nothing but trouble and misery. I accepted the present and the terms willingly, not in the least doubting my own care to preserve it, and highly satisfied to have my happiness in my own keeping. I was engaged in these thoughts, when a second person came to me, and observing the ring on my finger, took occasion to ask me some questions concerning it. I readily told him its virtues ; and his answer expressed a surprise at my weakness, in expecting such effects from a ring. I think he reasoned with me some time upon the impossibility of the thing; and at length urged me, in direct terms, to throw it away. At first I was shocked at the proposal; but his insinuations prevailed. I began to reason and doubt myself; and at last plucked it off my finger, and dropped it over the ship's side into the water; which it had no sooner touched, than I saw, the same instant, a terrible fire burst out from a range of the mountains, (a part of the Alps,) which appeared at some distance behind the city of Venice. I saw the hills as distinct as if awake, and they were all in flames. I perceived too late, my folly; and my tempter, with an air of insult, informed me, that all the mercy God had in reserve for me was comprised in that ring, which I had wilfully thrown away. I understood that I must now go with him to the burning mountains ; and that all the flames I saw were kindled upon my account. I trembled, and was in a great agony ; so that it was surprising I did not then awake : but my dream continued; and when I thought myself upon the point of a constrained departure, and stood, self-condemned, without plea or hope, suddenly, either a third person, or the same who brought the ring at first, came to me, (I am not certain which,) and demanded the cause of my grief. I told him the plain case, confessing that I had ruined myself wilfully, and deserved no pity. He blamed my rashness and asked if I should be wiser supposing I had my ring again? I could hardly answer to this; for I thought it was gone beyond recall. I believe, indeed, I had not time to answer, before I saw this unexpected friend go down under the water, just in the spot where I had dropped it ; and he soon returned, bringing the ring with him. The moment he came on board the flames in the mountains were extinguished, and my seducer left me. Then was "the prey taken from the hand of the mighty, and the lawful captive delivered." My fears were at an end, and with joy and gratitude I approached my kind deliverer to receive the ring, again; but he refused to return it, and spoke to this effect “If you should be entrusted with this ring again, you would very soon bring yourself into the same distress. You are not able to keep it; but I will preserve it for you, and, whenever it is needful, will produce it in your behalf.'' Upon this I awoke in a state of mind not easy to be described: I could hardly eat, or sleep, or transact my necessary business, for two or three days. But the impression soon wore off, and in a little time I totally forgot it ; and I think it hardly occurred to my mind again till several years afterward. It will appear, in the course of these papers, that a time came when I found myself in circumstances very nearly resembling those suggested by this extraordinary dream, when I stood helpless and hopeless upon the brink of an awful eternity; and I doubt not that, had the eyes of my mind been then opened, I should have seen my grand enemy, who had seduced me wilfully to renounce and cast away my religious profession, and to involve myself in the most complicated crimes, pleased with my agonies, and waiting for a permission to seize and bear away my soul to his place of torment. I should perhaps have seen likewise, that Jesus, whom I had persecuted and defied, rebuking the adversary, challenging me for his own, as a brand plucked out of the fire, and saying, “Deliver him from going down to the pit : I have found a ransom.” However, though I saw not these things, I found the benefit; I obtained mercy. The Lord answered for me in the day of my distress; and blessed be his name, he who restored the ring, (or what was signified by it,) vouchsafes to keep it. O what an unspeakable comfort is this, that I am not in my own keeping! “The Lord is my Shepherd.”

After fifteen months in captivity, Newton is rescued.

His conditions eventually improved when he was sold to a different master, and his new master allowed him to set up a small business with another trader on an island; a place called Kittim.

But he had written to his father asking for help and assistance.

The Captain of a trading ship in the area kept an eye out for Newton and brought him back to England.

One of the first questions he was asked was concerning me; and when the captain understood I was so near, he came on shore to deliver his message.

Had an invitation from home reached me when I was sick and starving at the Plantanes, I should have received it as life from the dead; but now, for the reasons already given, I heard it at first with indifference.

The captain told him a veritable fantasy of a large inheritance waiting at home and inveigled him back.

The captain, unwilling to lose me, told a story altogether of his own framing: he gave me a very plausible account how he had missed a large packet of letters and papers which he should have brought with him; but this he said he was sure of, having had it from my father's own mouth, as well as from his employer, that a person lately dead had left me £400 a year, adding further, that if I was any way embarrassed in my circumstances, he had express orders to redeem me, though it should cost one half of his cargo. Every particular of this was false; nor could I myself believe what he said about the estate ; but as I had some expectation from an aged relation, I thought a part of it might be true. But I was not long in suspense ; for though my father's care and desire to see me had too little weight with me, and would have been insufficient to make me quit my retreat yet the remembrance of Mrs. N , the hope of seeing her, and the possibility that accepting this offer might once more put me in a way of gaining her hand, prevailed over all other considerations. The captain further promised (and in this he kept his word,) that I should lodge in his cabin, dine at his table, and be his constant companion, without expecting any service from me. And thus I was suddenly freed from a captivity of about fifteen months. I had neither a thought nor a desire of this change one hour before it took place. I embarked with him, and in a few hours lost sight of Kittam.

So blind and stupid was I at that time, I made no reflection, I sought no direction in what had happened : like a wave of the sea, driven with the wind and tossed, 1 was governed by present appearances, and looked no farther. But He who is eyes to the blind was leading me in a way that I knew not.

Now I am in some measure enlightened, I can easily perceive that it is in the adjustment and concurrence of these seemingly fortuitous circumstances, that the ruling power and wisdom of God is most evidently displayed in human affairs. How many such casual events may we remark in the history of Joseph, which had each a necessary influence on his ensuing promotion ! If he had not dreamed, or if he had not told his dream ; if the Midianites bad passed by a day sooner, or a day later; if they had sold him to any person but Potiphar ; if his mistress had been a better woman; if Pharaoh's officers had not displeased their lord or if any, or all these things had fallen out in any other manner or time than they did, all that followed had been prevented ; the promises and purposes of God concerningIsrael, their bondage, deliverance, polity, and settlement, must have failed : and as all these things tended to, and centred in Christ, the promised Saviour, the desire of all nations, would not have appeared. Mankind had been still in their sins, without hope, and the counsels of God's eternal love in favour of sinners defeated. Thus we may see a connection between Joseph's first dream and the death of our Lord Christ, with all its glorious consequences. So strong, though secret, is the concatenation between the greatest and the smallest events. What a comfortable thought is this to a believer—to know that, amidst all the various interfering designs of men, the Lord has one constant design, which he cannot, will not, miss, namely, his own glory in the complete salvation of his people; and that he is wise, and strong, and faithful, to make even those things which seem contrary to this design, subservient to promote it.

John Newton’s conversion

Someone gave John Newton a copy of Stanhope's translation of Thomas A Kempis’ the Imitation of Christ.

I carelessly took it up, as I had often done before, to pass away the time ; but I had still read it with the same indifference as if it was entirely a romance. However, while I was reading this time, an involuntary suggestion arose in my mind, “What if these things should be true?” I could not bear the force of the inference, as it related to myself, and therefore shut the book presently My conscience witnessed against me once more-; and I concluded that, true or false, I must abide the consequences of my own choice. I put an abrupt end to these reflections by joining in with some vain conversation or other that came in the way.

But now the Lord’s time was come, and the conviction I was so unwilling to receive was deeply impressed upon me by an awful dispensation. I went to bed that night in my usual security and indifference, but was awakened from a sound sleep by the force of a violent sea which broke on board us. So much of it came down below as filled the cabin I lay in with water. This alarm was followed by a cry from the deck that the ship was going down, or sinking.

A man who went up on deck in John Newton’s place was washed overboard.

As soon as I could recover myself I essayed to go upon deck; but was met upon the ladder by the captain, who desired me to bring a knife with me. While I returned for the knife another person went up in my room, who was instantly washed overboard. We had no leisure to lament him ; nor did we expect to survive him long ; for we soon found the ship was filling with water very fast. The sea had torn away the upper timbers on one side, and made the ship a mere wreck in a few minutes. I shall not affect to describe this disaster in the marine dialect, which would be understood by few; and therefore I can give you but a very inadequate idea of it. Taking in all circumstances, it was astonishing, and almost miraculous, that any of us survived to relate the story. We had immediate recourse to the pumps; but the water increased against all our efforts: some of us were set to bailing in another part of the vessel, that is, to lade it out with buckets and pails. We had but eleven or twelve people to sustain this service ; and, notwithstanding all we could do, she was full, or very near it: and then, with a common cargo, she must have sunk of course; but we had a great quantity of beeswax and wood on board, which were specifically lighter than the water; and as it pleased God that we received this shock in the very crisis of the gale, toward morning we were enabled to employ some means for our safety, which succeeded beyond hope. In about an hour's time the day began to break, and the wind abated. We expended most of our clothes and bedding to stop the leaks (though the weather was exceedingly cold, especially to us who had so lately left a hot climate;) over these we nailed pieces of boards, and at last perceived the water abate. At the beginning of this hurry I was little affected. I pumped hard, and endeavoured to animate myself and my companions. I told one of them that in a few days this distress would serve us to talk of over a glass of wine but he being a less hardened sinner than myself, replied with tears, “No, it is too late now.” About nine o'clock, being almost spent with cold and labor, I went to speak with the captain, who was busied elsewhere ; and just as I was returning from him I said, almost without any meaning, “If this will not do, the Lord have mercy on us.” This (though spoken with little reflection) was the first desire I had breathed for mercy for the space of many years. I was instantly struck with my own words, and as Jehu said once, ‘What hast thou to do with peace?’ so it directly occurred, ‘What mercy can there be for me?’

I was obliged to return to the pump, and there I continued till noon, almost every pass ing wave breaking over my head ; but we made ourselves fast with ropes, that we might not be washed away. Indeed, I expected that every time the vessel descended in the sea, she would rise no more; and though I dreaded death now, and my heart foreboded the worst, if the Scriptures, which I had long since opposed, were indeed true, yet still I was but half-convinced, and remained for a space of time in a sullen frame, a mixture of despair and impatience. I thought if the Christian religion were true I could not be forgiven; and was therefore expecting, and almost, at times, wishing; to know the worst of it.

The 10th (that is, in the present style, the 21st) of March is a day much to be remembered by me; and I have never suffered it to pass wholly unnoticed since the year 1748: on that day the Lord sent from on high and delivered me out of deep waters. I continued at the pump from three in the morning till near noon, and then I could do no more. I went and lay down upon my bed, uncertain, and almost indifferent, whether I should rise again. In an hour's time I was called; and not being able to pump, I went to the helm and steered the ship till midnight, excepting a short interval for refreshment. I had here leisure and convenient opportunity for reflection. I began to think of my former religious professions ; the extraordinary turns in my life ; the calls, warnings, and deliverances I had met with; the licentious course of my conversation, particularly my unparalleled effrontery in making the gospel-history (which I could not then be sure was false, though I was not as yet assured it was true) the constant subject of profane ridicule. I thought, allowing the scripture premises, there never was, nor could be, such a sinner as myself; and then, comparing the advantages I had broken through, I concluded, at first, that my sins were too great to be forgiven. The scripture likewise seemed to say the same; for I had formerly been well acquainted with the Bible, and many passages, upon this occasion, returned upon my memory, particularly those awful passages, Prov. 1:24—31; Hebrews 6: 4—6; and 2Pet.2: 20, which seemed so exactly to suit my case and character as to bring with them a presumptive proof of a divine original. Thus, as I have said, I waited with fear and impatience to receive my inevitable doom. Yet though I had thoughts of this kind, they were exceedingly faint and disproportionate; it was not till long after, (perhaps several years,) till I had gained some clear views of the infinite righteousness and grace of Jesus Christ my Lord, that I had a deep and strong apprehension of my state by nature and practice : and perhaps till then I could not have borne the sight. So wonderfully does the Lord proportion the discoveries of sin and grace ; for he knows our frame, and that if he were to put forth the greatness of his power, a poor sinner would be instantly overwhelmed, and crushed as a moth.But to return: when I saw, beyond all probability, there was still a hope of respite, and heard, about six in the evening, that the ship was freed from water, there arose a gleam of hope ; I thought I saw the hand of God displayed in our favour : I began to pray.

I could not utter the prayer of faith : I could not draw near to a reconciled God, and call him Father. My prayer was like the cry of the ravens, which yet the Lord does not disdain to hear I now began to think of that Jesus whom I had so often derided ; I recollected the particulars of his life, and of his death: a death for sins not his own, but, as I remembered, for the sake of those who in their distress should put their trust in Him. And now I chiefly wanted evidence. The comfortless principles of infidelity were deeply riveted, and I lather wished than believed these things were real facts. You will please to observe, Sir, that I collect the strain of the reasonings and exercises of my mind in one view ; but I do not say that all this passed at one time. The gieat question now was, how to obtain faith? I speak not of an appropriating faith, (of which I then knew neither the nature nor necessity,) but how I should gain an assurance that the Scriptures were of divine inspiration, and a sufficient warrant for the exercise of trust and hope in God. One of the first helps I received (in consequence of a determination to examine the New Testament more carefully) was from Luke, 11:13. I had been sensible that to profess faith in Jesus Christ when in reality I did not believe his history, was no better than a mockery of the heart-searching God ; but here I found a Spirit spoken of, which was to be communicated to those who ask it. Upon this I reasoned thus: If this book is true, the promise in this passage is true likewise : I have need of that very Spirit by which the whole was written, in order to understand it aright. He has engaged here to give that Spirit to those who ask. I must therefore pray for it ; and if it is of God, he will make good his own word. My purposes were strengthened by John 7: 17. I concluded, from thence, that though I could not say from my heart that 1 believed the Gospel, yet I would for the present take it for granted, and that by studying it in this light I should be more and more confirmed in it. If what I am writing could be perused by our modern infidels, they would say (for I too well know their manner) that I was very desirous to persuade myself into this opinion. I confess I was ; and so would they be, if the Lord should show them, as he was pleased to show me at that time, the absolute necessity of some expedient to interpose between a righteous God and a sinful soul. Upon the gospel scheme I saw at least a peradventure of hope, but on every other side I was surrounded with black, unfathomable despair.

The wind was now moderate, but continued fair, and we were still drawing nearer to our port. We began to recover from our consternation, though we were greatly alarmed by our circumstances. We found that the water having floated nil our moveables in the hold, all the casks of provision had been beaten to pieces by the violent motion of the ship ; on the other hand, our live stock, such as pigs, sheep, and poultry, had been washed overboard in the storm. In effect, all the provisions we saved, except the fish I mentioned, and some food of the pulse kind, which used to be given to the hogs, (and there was but little of this left,) all our other provisions would have subsisted us but a week at scanty allowance. The sails , too, were mostly blown away, so that we advanced but slowly even while the wind was fair. We imagined ourselves about a hundred leagues from the land, but were in reality much farther. Thus we proceeded with an alternate prevalence of hopes and fears. My leisure time was chiefly employed in reading and meditating on the scripture, and praying to the Lord for mercy and instruction.

Things continued thus for four or five days, or perhaps longer, till we were awakened one morning by the joyful shouts of the watch upon deck proclaiming the sight of land. We were all soon raised at the sound. The dawning was uncommonly beautiful, and the light (just strong enough to discover distant objects) presented us with a gladdening prospect: it seemed a mountainous coast, about twenty miles from us, terminating in a Cape, or point; and a little further, two or three small islands, or hummocks, as just rising out of the water ; the appearance and position seemed exactly answerable to our hopes, resembling the north-west extremity of Ireland, which we were steering for. We sincerely congratulated each other, making no doubt but that, if the wind continued, we should be in safety and plenty the next day. We ate up the residue of our bread for joy at this welcome sight, and were in the condition of men suddenly reprieved from death. While we were thus alert, the mate, with a graver tone than the rest, sunk our spirits by saying "that he wished it might prove land at last." If one of the common sailors had first said so, I know not but the rest would have beat him for raising such an unreasonable doubt.

It brought on, however, warm debates and disputes, whether it was land or not ; but the case was soon unanswerably decided, for the day was advancing fast, and in a little time one of our fancied islands began to grow red from the approach of the sun, which soon arose just under it. In a word, we had been prodigal of our bread too hastily; our land was nothing but clouds; and in half an hour more the whole appearance was dissipated. Seamen have often known deceptions of this sort, but in our extremity we were very loth to be undeceived. However, we comforted ourselves that though we could not see the land yet, we should soon, the wind hitherto continuing fair. But, alas ! we were deprived of this hope 'likewise. That very day our fair wind subsided into a calm, and the next morning the gales sprung up from the south-east, directly against us, and continued so for more than a fortnight afterward. The ship was so wrecked that we were obliged to keep the wind always on the broken side, unless the weather was quite moderate. Thus we were driven, by the wind fixing in that quarter, still further from our port, to the northward of all Ireland, as far as the Lewis, or western islands of Scotland, but a long way to the westward. In a word, our station was such as deprived us of any hope of being relieved by other vessels. It may, indeed, be questioned whether our ship was not the very first that had been in that part of the ocean at the same season of the year.

Provisions now began to grow very short: the half of a salted cod was a day's subsistence for twelve people. We had plenty of fresh water, but no bread, hardly any clothes, and very cold weather. We had incessant labor with the pumps to keep the ship above water. Much labor and little food wasted us fast, and one man died under the hardship. Yet our sufferings were light in comparison to our just fears We could not afford this bare allowance much longer, but had a terrible prospect of being either starved to death, or reduced to feed upon one another. Our expectations grew darker every day ; and I had a further trouble, peculiar to myself. The captain, whose temper was quite soured by distress, was hourly reproaching me (as I formerly observed) as the sole cause of the calamity, and was confident that if I was thrown overboard, and not otherwise, they should be preserved from death. He did not intend to make the experiment ; but the continual repetition of this in my ears gave me much uneasiness, especially as my conscience seconded his words; I thought it very probable that all that had befallen us was on my account. I was at last found out by the powerful hand of God, and condemned in my own breast. However, proceeding in the method I have described, I began to conceive hopes greater than all my fears especially when, at the time we were ready to give up all for lost, and despair was taking place in every countenance, I saw the wind come about to the very point we wished it, so as best to suit that broken part of the ship which must be kept out of the water, and to blow so gentle as our few remaining sails could bear; and thus it continued, without any observable alteration or increase, though at an unsettled time of the year, till we once more were called up to see the land, and were convinced that it was land indeed. We saw the island Tory, and the next day anchored in Lough Swilly, in Ireland. This was the 8th of April, just four weeks after the damage we sustained from the sea. When we came into this port our very last victuals were boiling in the pot ; and before we had been there two hours, the wind, which seemed to have been providentially restrained till we were in a place of safety, began to blow with great violence ; so that, if we had continued at sea that night, in our shattered enfeebled condition, we must, in all human appearance, have gone to the bottom. About this time I began to know that there is a God that hears and answers prayer. How many times has he appeared for me since this great deliverance ! Yet, alas ! how distrustful and ungrateful is my heart unto this hour.

John Newton’s Marriage

We finished our voyage, and arrived in Liverpool. When the ship's affairs were settled, I went to London, and from thence (as you may suppose) I soon repaired to Kent. More than seven years had now elapsed since my first visit. No views of the kind could seem more chimerical, or could subsist under greater discouragements than mine had done; yet, through the overruling goodness of God, while I seemed abandoned to myself, and blindly following my own headstrong passions, I was guided by a hand that I knew not, to the accomplishment of my wishes. Every obstacle was now removed. I had renounced my former follies, my interest was established, and friends on all sides consenting, the point was now entirely between ourselves ; and after what had passed, was easily concluded. Accordingly our hands were joined on the 1st of February, 1750. The satisfaction I have found in this union, you will suppose has been greatly heightened by reflection on the former disagreeable contrasts I had passed through, and the views I have had of the singular mercy and providence of the Lord in bringing it to pass. If you please to look back to the beginning of my sixth letter, I doubt not but you will allow, that few persons have known more, either of the misery or happiness of which human life (as considered in itself) is capable. How easily, at a time of life when I was so little capable of judging, (but a few months more than seventeen) might my affections have been fixed where they could have met with no return, or where success would have been the heaviest disappointment. The long delay I met with was likewise a mercy; for had I succeeded a year or two sooner, before the Lord was pleased to change my heart, we must have been mutually unhappy, even as to the present life. "Surely mercy and goodness have followed me all my days!"

Still a slave trader.

Despite his conversion, Newton persisted for some time in the profession of a Captain of a slave ship.

However, I considered myself as a sort of gaoler or turnkey, and I was sometimes shocked with an employment that was perpetually conversant with chains, bolts, and shackles. In this view I had often petitioned, in my prayers, that the Lord, in his own time, would be pleased to fix me in a more humane calling, and, if it might be, place me where I might have more frequent converse with his people and ordinances, and be freed from those long separations from home, which very often were hard to bear. My prayers were now answered, though in a way I little expected. I now experienced another sudden, unforeseen change of life. I was within two days of sailing, and, to all appearance, in as good health as usual ; but in the afternoon, as I was sitting with Mrs. Newton, drinking tea by ourselves, and talking over past events, I was in a moment seized with a fit which deprived me of sense and motion, and left me no other sign of life than that of breathing. I suppose it was of the apoplectic kind. It lasted about an hour ; and when I recovered, it left a pain and dizziness in my head, which continued, with such symptoms as induced the physicians to judge it would not be safe or prudent for me to proceed on the voyage. Accordingly, by the advice of my friend to whom the ship belonged, I resigned the command the day before she sailed; and thus I was unexpectedly called from that service, and freed from a share of the future consequences of that voyage, which proved extremely calamitous. The person who went in my room, most of the officers, and many of the crew died, and the vessel was brought home with great difficulty.

He got work as a customs agent, and finding it was a job with a comparatively large amount of leisure time, spent his time learning Greek, Hebrew and reading theology and the Bible.

Seeing his passion for the Bible, Newton's friends suggested he become a priest in the Church of England. John Gilbert, Archbishop of York, turned him down in 1758 supposedly for having no university degree, although his evangelical leanings and tendency to socialise with Methodists might have been the real reason for his rejection.

Newton wrote about his experiences in the slave trade and his conversion. Impressed by his story, William Legge, 2nd Earl of Dartmouth, sponsored Newton for ordination by John Green, Bishop of Lincoln.

Newton became the curate of Olney, Buckinghamshire, in 1764.

Olney was a poor community where the main industry was lace-making. Newton preached about his own life experiences, and his temptations to sin and his weaknesses, and he was much loved by his parishioners. He said his mission was to “break a hard heart and to heal a broken heart”

AMAZING GRACE - written when John Newton was in his late forties.

Amazing grace! (how sweet the sound)
   That sav'd a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found,
   Was blind, but now I see.

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
   And grace my fears reliev'd;
How precious did that grace appear
   The hour I first believ'd!

Thro' many dangers, toils, and snares,
   I have already come;
'Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far,
   And grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promis'd good to me,
   His word my hope secures;
He will my shield and portion be
   As long as life endures.

Yes, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
   And mortal life shall cease;
I shall possess, within the veil,
   A life of joy and peace.

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow,
   The sun forbear to shine;
But God, who call'd me here below,
   Will be forever mine.

John Newton, Olney Hymns, 1779

Epitaph

John Newton died in 1805; here is his epitaph.

JOHN NEWTON, Clerk,
Once an Infidel and Libertine,
A servant of slaves in Africa,
Was, by the rich mercy of our Lord and Savior, JESUS CHRIST,
Preserved, restored, pardoned,
And appointed to preach the Faith,
(He had long labored to destroy,)
Near sixteen years at Olney, in Bucks, And. . yearsinthischurch.
On Feb. 1, 1750, he married
MARY,
Daughter of the late George Catlett,
Of Chatham, Kent.
He resigned her, to the Lord who gave her,

On the 15th of December, 1790.

References

THE LIFE OF JOHN NEWTON, ONCE A SAILOR, AFTERWARDS CAPTAIN OF A SLAVE SHIP, AND SUBSEQUENTLY RECTOR OF ST. MARY WOOLNOTH, LONDON. By John Newton, New York 1854

And

THOUGHTS UPON THE AFRICAN SLAVE TRADE by John Newton, London 1788

Change Log

10:05am 15 November 2022 - changed the first sentence from:

Let us never forget the amazing wonders of God’s grace, for on some occasions the Lord calls the most hardened sinners into a life of faith and grace.

to

Let us never forget the amazing wonders of God’s grace, for the Lord may even bring the most hardened sinner into a life of faith and grace; the chief example of this is the apostle Paul. John Newton is another wonderful example. This should encourage sinners like us to turn to the Lord for mercy and grace, no matter how far outside his forgiveness we may believe our sins are.

Also added:

The sections in non-italic text are Newton’s own words; note that I have not edited out the things he says that may seem less than politically correct today, as the tenor of Newton’s whole life belies the sorts of linguistic peccadilloes for which people are condemned these days.

10:15am Also added the phrase Later on, when he returned from sea voyages he would go to see her, but until his conversion was tongue-tied and could not express his love for her or his desire to marry her.

And fixed a number of small typos and errors. (Most of this was copied from pdf scans of the two books mentioned in the References above, accordingly the text recognition was a little faulty in places)

11:14am added then removed And it shows how ridiculous political correctness is; it is not where someone started or what they did in the past that matters: it is the direction in which they are heading. I’m not sure it’s relevant.